Darkside love affair
by PurpleVampire
Summary: She's the embodiment of the law. He's a rebel without a cure. She's the beauty. He's the tragedy. He's been thinking about her for four years, but she forgot him shortly after she saw him. Four years, three days, two nights and then eternity. AH, AxJ


**I don't know exactly how I came up with this story, but I know that I was thinking about my twin-who-is-not-actually-my-twin [;))] who is inconceivably drawn to Mr. Jasper Whitlock so I decided to write something for her…let's say as a Christmas gift. Considering that my writing skills are far from being artistic I hope I won't bore her to tears. **

**So…this is my own sort of one-shot, written in a week, from Alice's point of view. I must admit that I have a problem with bad guys and this is the result. I hope my morello cherry won't kill me for drooling intensely over her…masculine doll.**

Darkside love affair

**M**onday morning…just another rainy day unfolding its wings on Seattle and another day of work for me. I was sitting on my leather chair, drumming my fingers on the table and staring absentmindedly in the distance. Why had I given into my parent's intimidating pleas of becoming a lawyer, I still couldn't comprehend. It was not something I loved to do or dreamt about, but after spending an entire life by my father's side it was the only thing I knew best. I was only 26 years old and I was already a director. My father decided to retire at the beginning of the year and so the family business fell on my shoulders. As much as I tried to make it look otherwise it was an overwhelming burden.

The profession they had chosen for me was too somber to fit my character. I didn't mind wearing daily black or gray costumes. I knew perfectly how to dress myself in order to look business-like and still attractive. Sometimes it was funny to deliver a speech and have an entire audience gawking at my outfit. But most frequently it was just annoying to hold back my thoughts and ideas or the reactions I was supposed to have. I was forced to keep myself in check 24/7. My nature was not gloomy and serious as a lawyer's should be. I was cheerful and crazy and desperately craving for freedom.

Those four walls trapping me in their cage were sucking the happiness out of me. At times I was so depressed and irritated that I was on the point of writing on my door _"If you enter you won't come out"_ or _"Don't touch my door because I'll snap your head off your shoulders."_ Instead of that I was just locking my door and turning off every phone in my radius. This morning was one of those annoyingly boring days that I hated so much. I had a lot to do, but I had neither the spirits nor the desire to start working. I wanted so much to go shopping or walking or sun bathing or anything. Anything that meant freedom. I would have killed for a little free time.

Just when I wanted to sit up and wander to the window a sharp sound sliced the silence. Argh…I had forgotten to turn off those damned phones. I frowned down at the black receiver, ready to smash it if it dared to ring again, but I gave up on my quarrelsome intentions when it reached its fourth chime.

"What is it?" I demanded goaded.

"Miss Brandon, I am sorry for disturbing you. The person for his apprenticeship is here. Should I invite him in?" my secretary droned on. I rolled my eyes at her eager voice and resigned myself to the idea of working. I really had to start moving now.

"Tell him to wait five minutes," I instructed through the receiver, then tossed it in its designated place and headed to my personal bathroom to wash my face.

The person, as Gianna had called him, was not actually here for an apprenticeship, but more for doing some forced labor. I knew about him very little. He was one of my father's friends' son and graduated from Law University with honors, but didn't want to profess. In place of making a career he preferred to be a night guy who participated in illegal car races. That until he got caught by the police. I wondered why he had wasted all those money for University if he didn't even like the job. But then again, who was I to judge him? I made my way out of the bathroom, slamming the door shut behind me, then danced across the room to unlock my office door.

Though I didn't want to accept it, I was curious to meet the guy I had to babysit for a week. I was responsible for supervising his work firsthand then report it to the police station. He had been bailed out of prison on the one condition of doing labor for the community. My father, of course, had offered to help and I had to obey. Besides the endless amount of work I had to complete I was now with a criminal on my front door. Or not as much of a criminal as of a tough guy.

A knock at the door startled me alert and I resumed my sit not before I muttered under my breath "Come in, tough guy." The tough guy looked as tough as his behavior had described him.

He was wearing wide black jeans and a tight black button-down shirt that shaped perfectly on his form. His muscular body was beyond imposing and his tall stature was actually frightening. You could have said he was a serial killer if you hadn't watched his face. Attentively. At first, I come across his silky hair arranged in a concoction of golden shades and his wide green eyes. They were mesmerizing. He seemed to be carrying an ancient weight in his gaze that he tried to hide with his defiant pose.

He took several steps toward my desk without my approval, which irritated me slightly, but I didn't comment on that. I was too concentrated on scrutinizing him. His skin was too white to be real and too smooth-looking to not beg to be touched. I fisted my hands together in my lap to keep from doing something stupid, then I remembered I was supposed to welcome him, tell him to take a sit and before that maybe to shake his hand. I chuckled wily internally, then stood up and looked straight into his eyes. He frowned for a moment, then his features relaxed completely. I felt like I was enveloped into strange veils of emotions as my heart seemed to pound at full speed in my chest. I prayed to God not to make a fool of myself. I couldn't comprehend what was suddenly happening to me or the feeling I got the moment I saw that man stepping inside my office.

"Welcome, Mr..." I started, dropping my eyes to the folder I had in front of me. I knew his name, but it was in my nature to torment people like that so I feigned I didn't know it.

"Whitlock," we said at the same time. The way my voice melted in his sent chills up my spine. It sounded terrifyingly beautiful. Though he had spat through his gritted teeth the name, I didn't consider that as an offense. Maybe I was too absorbed by his appearance. I blinked twice only to realize how memorable his face was and how familiar his voice had rung in my ears. It took me all I had not to ask him if we met before.

"Jasper Whitlock," he introduced himself, trying to conceal the anger in his voice. Of course. He was angry and upset because he was here. I had to remind myself what forced labor meant. He didn't want to be here and not more than two minutes ago I hadn't wanted him here either. Now, though...

"I was waiting for you," my mouth spoke of its own accord. "I am Alice Brandon. Please have a sit." He snorted at my formal tone and I automatically glared at him. No one snorted at me. Not even a beautiful god.

"I would say I was waiting to get here, but I wasn't," he commented in his velvety and yet husky voice while he sank in one of the chairs in front of my desk.

I sat too, keeping my eyes glued on his face, though he was firmly avoiding me. Having him so near I could analyze him intently without making it look like I was dumbly staring at him. My brows knit together when I registered a violent crescent scar snaking its way from his jaw to his neck. The man must be some kind of fighter. I shuddered, but inched forward to him. Although rationality dictated that I must keep my distance I was drawn to him by invisible laces.

I had given him his time to look at me, but he let his eyes flow above every part of the room except for the one that included me. The practice of being a lawyer as my father had taught me kept me from sticking my tongue out at him and slapping him in the face to look at me when I wanted to talk. I only sighed under my breath and his eyes snapped to mine. He frowned again making me blush like a fifteen year old. He couldn't have heard my sigh, but his eyes spoke differently. I straightened in my chair and crossed my hands on my folder and mentally skimmed through what I wanted to tell him.

"So Mr. Whitlock," I began, struck again by the familiarity revolving around him. "You are here to help me complete Mrs. Hale and Mr.'s McCarty divorce."

"I was under the impression they sent me here to do forced labor, not to help." This time his green eyes were piercing through mine like he was trying to find something hidden in the core of my being. This time I was the one looking away. Experience, however, helped me compose myself immediately.

"You are under a good impression, Mr. Whitlock," I forced out, unable to fully keep the scowl from my face. Apparently my attitude had only succeeded in making him chuckle. He leaned against the back of his chair and pulled his legs forward in a total unceremonious gesture, crossing his arms on his chest. He waited for me to speak, but I couldn't force the words out. I stared at him in surprise and disbelief. "And perhaps you should be under the impression that I will supervise your every move this week" I finally uttered with indignation.

"Yes ma'am," he nodded. I gritted my teeth at his defiance. In truth, I couldn't remember anyone daring to provoke me this way in my life. They knew better. But this creature... he didn't know how to behave around me, it appeared. I let out a chuckle of my own and he arched an eyebrow staggered.

"I have to tell you that Mrs. Rosalie Hale and Mr. Emmett McCarty have already divorced twice so their reason is most certainly something trivial. There's a huge possibility they will defend each other until the point of annoyance when they will realize it's best to postpone the meeting. I hope you will deal properly with them."

I felt devious just to picture him in front of Rose and Em. They were good friends of mine and they truly loved each other, but each time they disagreed on something they felt the need to divorce. Most of the time me or Emmett's brother, Edward, talked them into maintaining their calm, but twice none of us succeeded in making them see reason. So they got the divorce only to realize how badly they needed each other and married after two weeks. This time Emmett had lost Rose's puppy on the street and she snapped with anger. They fought worse than ever before and they came to me to ask me to divorce them. I took in a deep breath, knowing that both of them will be mad at me for bringing in a strange person to their love affair, but they had to please me. Just this once. I had the feeling that the two of them will nag the life out of Mr. Jasper Whitlock. Thinking about his first name made me dizzy.

"Don't you have another case?" he inquired. "I don't like this."

"Oh, I'm sorry. You're not here to choose," I smile maliciously.

He rolled his eyes then focused his attention on me. Earlier, I had wanted him to look at me. Now, when he finally was looking at me without being distracted by anything I felt like I was naked. Like he knew every part of my body.

"As commanding as ever," he mumbled under his breath. My eyes were surely popping out of their sockets as his words sank in.

"Beg your pardon?" I heard my voice echoing. The blood was quickly leaving my face and I felt cold. Inexplicably cold.

"You Alice, you like to torment me as always. And seemingly you don't even care." He breathed heavily before he stood up and headed for the window. I could see his raged expression on the shiny glass. And I couldn't understand a word of what he was saying. Truth being told, he seemed more familiar with each second's passing, but I definitely couldn't locate him in the coffin of my memories.

"Do I know you?" I asked him. It sounded lame even to my own ears. He sneered and shook his head. I trembled my way in his direction, but didn't have the courage to reach his side.

"As you can see, you don't know me, though we have attended the same college and I've been lurking around you for four years. But what do I say? You were always busy, always planning something, always shopping with your friends, always melting in someone's accolades. But never looking in my direction." By the time he had finished his hands were balled into fists, shaking with fury. I wanted to explain to myself why his attitude hurt me, why the pained expression on his face hit my heart at full force.

"I'm sorry, I - ," I wanted to say something worthy of a mature person, but the words were spinning on the tip of my tongue without making their way out. I sighed defeated and after a long tormenting silence I paced silently toward him. I reached out for him, putting my small hand on his huge warm shoulder. He froze under my touch and waited a moment before he moved so I couldn't lay my hand on him anymore.

"This case you were talking about has a file?" he said, attempting to sound casual. His voice, though, was full of emotions, emotions that, for some strange reason, were mirrored in my heart.

"Y-es," I answered uncertainly, watching his back as he shuffled his feet to my desk. His mood swing was beyond confusing. Less than five minutes ago he had been fuming about me not noticing him in college and now he was acting like I was nothing.

"Then I assume this folder on your desk is for me."

"Yes," I repeated, unable to move from that spot.

"Good," he murmured, snatching it off the desk and darting to the door. "I'll be working on it," he added before an earsplitting sound rebounded in the whole room.

I closed my eyes, shocked at the force he had smashed the door shut and the immensity of my emotions. Right there and then it felt like I'd lost everything and yet won it back. He had looked familiar and now I remembered why. Not only because of what he'd told me, but also because of what I was recalling of my own. He was Jasper Whitlock, the man I'd crashed into on the day of my first exam. He had apologized as he gathered my things and I nodded my gratitude, incapable of speaking. The emotions had been so powerful that I'd been running out of breath. I remembered he smiled before I ran away like a lunatic. Maybe this was what triggered his anger at me. Maybe this was why he thought I ignored him. Only if he knew…

The rest of the day passed infuriatingly slow with me struggling to find a good excuse to rush into his newly-assembled office, but absolutely failing. By eight o'clock in the evening I was bored and crossed enough to want to get to my apartment as soon as possible. I needed some time for myself to figure out why I was feeling like that and why I couldn't get him out of my mind. I grabbed my purse from the sofa and made sure my wallet and my car keys where in there, then I turned off the reading-lamp on my desk and I groped my way to the door. Outside my office it was pitch black. Gianna had left an hour earlier and switched off all the lights on our floor, leaving behind a cold darkness. To be honest, it was not that dim, but darkness was freaking me out.

"Did you plan to leave without your folder?" a whisper seized the silence. Before I could realize who was behind me a loud shriek of panic escaped my lips.

"For God's sake," I've barely whispered, glaring at him, though I doubted he could see me.

"I don't understand why you're complaining," he chuckled. "You are the one prowling about."

"I'm not prowling about," I argued. "It's my firm."

"Then you shouldn't be trembling like a deer caught in the headlights," he softly pointed out.

I opened my mouth to say something more, but my brain seemed to be the victim of a short-circuit. I turned enraged to leave, but so unlike me I bumped into the first thing standing in my way. The clash with that damn chair was evidently going to leave a bruise on my skin. I winced at the thought, but ignored the sharp pain in my stomach and stubbornly headed toward the door.

"Let me get you outside," he ordered wrapping his hand on my arm. It felt cold even through my clothes. My obstinacy was yelling at me to shrug off of his hold, but my body was longing for him.

"Fine," I snapped and I could swear I saw him smiling in that shady room.

He didn't remove his hand from my arm, continuing to guide me until we reached the elevator where he was sure that I could manage walking on my own. With every step I was gaining a confidence I hadn't expected. I was feeling strange, that was for sure, but I was Mary Alice Brandon which meant I wasn't about to let him see me so disrupted.

"Miss Brandon," the door keeper nodded his good night. I gave him a small smile and let myself out, being conscious of his presence all the time.

"Are you following me?" I inquired once outside the building, just before I realized that he was probably heading for his car too.

"Do you want me to follow you?" he teased. It was becoming impossible to ignore the man.

My car beeped its welcome to me, waiting patiently to open its door. Seconds after, the car beside it beeped too and flashed a blinding light. It was a kyanite blue XKR Jaguar. I could only picture myself: wide stunned eyes, mouth hanging open, heart racing at that beauty. I was surely drooling, by the time he opened the door and chortled.

"You like it?" he asked, seeming carefree at last.

"Do you have any doubts?"

He smirked satisfied and tossed a bag inside, then approached me with slow deliberate paces. I was still in shock, fantasizing about that car. Suddenly my yellow Porsche was not as precious as it used to be.

"Here it is your file. I've made one for myself." His eyes were on me as he spoke, but I was absorbed too much by his spectacular car to care about the case I'd put him in charge of.

"Do you race with it?" I asked in a trance. My eyes flickered to his face to see him frowning in confusion then smoothing his face out with a smile.

"No. Never with my car."

"Good," I agreed satisfied.

"Then I think we should have lunch tomorrow," he suddenly voiced. For a second I looked at him dumbfounded, then he dangled in front of me Rose and Emmett's file. I took the folder from his hands with reluctance. "Maybe we should discuss this in detail," he added.

"You should have kept it. I know by heart what's written inside of this."

A smile played across his lips, then waved at me getting in his car. The engine purred to life and in a flash second he was gone. I opened the door of my Porsche and got inside, hiding from the emotional assault he had shot at me. Although the parking lot was almost empty, I took all the possible precaution measures and smoothly drove into the night. I rolled my windows down inhaling the sweet cold air when I heard a noisy sound on my tracks. It was the unmistakable roaring of a sport car.

"I wanted to be diligently in my work," his voice came from my left. I gasped at his unexpected appearance, amusing him. He was driving at my own speed, keeping a single hand on the steering wheel, and clearly looking like he had slowed down. I was driving pretty fast myself so that made me wonder how fast he was willing to drive. I had a feeling I didn't want to know. "I hope I'll have good references from you, Miss Brandon," he murmured seductively and stepped on the gas and disappeared with his eyes stuck on mine.

"God," I murmured both frustrated and amused in the silence of my car. What was he doing to me?

The next day perched inside my bedroom with cold sun rays dancing across my skin. I had dreamt about him and about that colossal clash on the day of my first exam. He had no idea that I'd thought about him for weeks, that I had even wanted to introduce myself to him, but some strange reason held me back. After that day, though, I had never seen him again so how did he dare to reproach me anything? He had stood hidden for those four years. What had I been supposed to do?

I took notice of my surroundings only when my phone warned me that it was two o'clock in the afternoon. I was expected to meet him for lunch and I was going to be late. Great...just great. I sighed exasperated, trying to gain control of myself, but something interrupted me.

"You seem impatient," he said. This time he didn't startle me. It felt normal to have him there.

"You wish," I retorted, rolling my eyes.

"You know, I can feel you and you're definitely impatient." His melodic voice was triggering weird reactions inside of me. It made me feel giddy.

"And if you feel me so well, can you feel me starving?" I questioned attempting to sound crossed, but incapable of keeping the smile off my face.

"I think I've just heard your stomach singing, yes." I laughed along with him and followed his lead. Gianna winked at me with specific implications and I shook my head, making an effort not to think whether or not there was any truth in her gesture.

We took the elevator underground to the parking lot and I automatically reached for my purse to grab the keys of my car. He gently clasped my wrist looking questioningly at me.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"I need my keys," I responded, understanding what was in his mind.

"You don't need them," he confirmed my thoughts. "I invited you so it's only fair I'm driving. Besides, I know you want to drive with me."

I had never thought that arrogance could turn me on, but his haughtiness was without a doubt sweet. I could tell he was not arrogant inside, but he was acting like that to taunt me. And yes, he was right. I wanted to drive with him. Not only because he was the possessor of a classy striking car, but also because I wanted to be near him. In that moment I made up my mind that I wanted to find out more about him. And I wanted to listen to him describing himself, not my father, not anyone else.

"Sure," I shot back mockingly and grabbed the keys. If he wanted to pester me, then he had to be ready for me pestering him.

"I mean it," he pressed, squeezing my wrist a bit more tightly, then he dragged me to his car. If I had believed it was striking from outside...well from inside it was deathly gorgeous. By the time my mouth had closed he was already far away from the grounds of the firm.

"Feel alright?" he suddenly asked. His question surprised me. I was feeling fine.

"Yes," I answered simply.

"You seem worried." I shook my head and waited for him to continue, but he didn't say anything else. He just looked at me from time to time checking if I was fine as I had told him. I wanted to tell him that he was the one looking worried, but I held my tongue back. When I thought it had passed at least half an hour I looked at my watch. Exactly half an hour since we left the office.

"Where are we going?" I asked puzzled. We weren't going to lunch on Mars, were we?

"Are you finally admitting that you're impatient?" He arched his eyebrow, waiting for my answer.

"I'm not impatient. I just don't want our lunch to end up into a diner."

"Our lunch," he repeated, furrowing his brows and looking out the windshield. "We will have lunch, Trust me. Just ten more minutes." I waited those ten minutes and sure enough at 2:50 pm he parked on one side of the road and got out of the car. Was he kidding me? There was no restaurant in the area.

"Why are we here wh-" I began protesting, but he put one finger on my lips, efficiently icing up my words.

"Shut up," he ordered. "Just this once quit being commanding." I couldn't oppose to his desire so I obeyed.

He held his hand out for me and I took it without thinking. I danced out of his car and immediately got stricken by the landscape. The trees were dressed in a fantasy of leaves colored from shades of greenish yellow to deep red and the blanket of vegetation seemed to be waltzing above the ground. Some feet away from the spot he had parked his car there was a breach in the curtain of trees. He tugged on my hand and led me directly to it. We were definitely not going to a restaurant, but by this point I couldn't care less.

He didn't talk as we walked hand in hand amidst the forest and I didn't break the silence either. As the path we had been following ended, he tensed up and stroked his thumb against my hand. I wondered if he had done it consciously. I blinked twice at the sight in front of me and to my surprise it didn't disappear. I looked at him asking him with my eyes if this was real. He nodded, smiling and I smiled too.

The house in front of us looked as if it was made of glass. The wall facing us was entirely made of glass and a small part of the roof too. It looked magnificent and in that breathtaking background I was rightful to believe it might disappear.

He dragged me forward and I moved like a puppet, thinking we were heading to the stairs leading inside. But no. The expression on his face promised more. He pointed at the left side of the house and quickly took us there. If possible, my eyes grew wider. A glossy lake spread out in front of us with white and yellow water lilies. A fairy tale wouldn't have been so perfect. I was astounded. God it was beautiful. He was beautiful. And maybe I wasn't in my right mind, but I felt like I was a piece of that picture.

To the right, somewhere closer to the lake and still not close enough there was a table that I assumed he had arranged. It was covered in a white silky material like the wedding ones with matching chairs. In front of one of the chairs there was lying a red camellia. I squeezed his hand unconsciously and he bent hid head to mine just the tiniest bit.

"Now I think it's time for you to say something," he let out a small nervous laugh.

"I -" I started, still dazzled.

"Maybe you should eat first. I promise I won't poison you. I'm a pretty good cook."

"It's beautiful. It's amazing." For the first time since he jumped in my life I wasn't feeling embarrassed by the way my voice was trembling.

"I'm glad you like it. I thought it would be more special than a restaurant."

"It is," I agreed.

"After you," he whispered in my ear, making my heart race faster than any sport car ever could. I danced lightly toward the table, careful not to spoil the perfection around me. He pulled out the chair for me like a southern gentleman, then he sat across from me, eying me curiously. I fingered the flower with a smile on my lips, then bore my gaze in his. He didn't look away.

"Is it for me?"

"Yes." It amazed me that he didn't feel the need to tease me anymore. I smiled happily and thanked him, sniffing it deeply.

"It's beautiful," I couldn't help, but say again those words. I was transfixed.

"Indeed it is," he agreed.

"Is this your house?" I asked above a whisper.

"Yes. Let's say races and bets are not that bad after all."

I stared at him confused for a moment, then his relaxed laugh caused me even more confusion, but now I was relaxed as well. The tension we had had wrapped around us at the office seemed to vanish. I was glad for that. "I'm not necessarily pleased with the way I've procured the money, but I'm definitely pleased with the outcome. I've been dreaming about this house for a long time. Too bad it's so empty," he explained.

"I bet you bring here your girlfriends so it can't be that empty," I muttered, more curious about his next answer than I cared to admit.

"I don't have a girlfriend," he replied serious, clenching his teeth. I was on the point of apologizing, but in the end I decided I shouldn't. "You're the first person who comes here," he confessed after a pause, looking away. In a minute I realized more than one thing.

"Your parents don't know about this?" I giggled in surprise. He loosened up mindlessly and looked at me.

"No, they don't."

"You're unbelievable. I wish I could do something like this."

"I promise I'll help you," he joked.

Hours passed and we talked and laughed and he let aside his tough mask so I did the same. It felt so comfortable, so right to be there with him. I wanted to know more about him and especially more about those four years he had reproached me about, but I was afraid to bring up the subject. I didn't want to ruin the moment. It was for sure six o'clock when he suddenly got up and anxiously asked me for forgiveness, then he darted inside to bring our meal.

"I told you our lunch would become our diner," I reminded him. He smiled apologetically and placed a plate in front of me. It smelled delicious. I ate like I hadn't been eating for a century, not breaking eye contact with him. Here, so far away from the noise of the city, he was totally changed. He was not arrogant or defiant. His eyes were not loaded with sadness. He was himself, joking and unperturbed, and I was painfully drawn to him.

"Would you walk with me," he asked after we finished eating. I nodded my agreement and once more took his hand.

We were on the lakeside walking silently and just taking in everything around us when I couldn't restrain myself any longer.

"Would you tell me something honestly if I asked you?"

"Yes," he answered and his promptitude staggered me.

"When was the first time you met me?"

He had definitely not expected that question. His expression of confusion melted into one of bitterness, then he stifled both with a sigh. I bent down to take off my shoes just for something to do and I stepped nearer to the water, letting it float over my skin. It was cold, but not cold enough to extinguish the fire smoldering inside of me.

"You crashed into me and all your things clattered to the ground. I helped you gather them and then you ran away from me." After he finished, we both waited in silence for the other to speak.

"I should slap you, you know?" I murmured eventually.

"Because?" he demanded too tortured for my taste.

"Because you accused me of not registering you and I remember perfectly well that day. I remember you...even if it's too late now." He brought me to a halt and looked deeply into my eyes. I closed them like I coward. I didn't want him to see what was blossoming in my heart.

"You remembered?"

"I did and back then I've thought about you, but I've never seen you again. You disappeared so...it's not my fault...I would have..." I trailed off powerlessly.

"Alice," he stopped me. "It's okay." Though I knew I shouldn't look him in the eyes, hearing him pronouncing my name forced my eyes wide open. They were blazing with excitement. It was the first time he called me by my first name. "I was a jerk and I'm sorry. Can I ask you something now," he asked seriously.

"Yes," I nodded.

"Why did you run away that day?" I knew it wasn't polite to burst into laughter, but I couldn't help it. He seemed so tormented and so concerned and the reason why I'd run away was so insignificant.

"Because I was late for my first exam, little fool," I managed to inform him, pinching his waist. He stood still for a moment to process my words, then joined me in my laughter.

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah. I am. What have you thought? That I was crazy?"

"Maybe," he teased, but he didn't have time to finish his words. A heavy cold rain started out of the blue and in less than a minute I was drenched to the bone. I couldn't believe it was raining. He began laughing and I smacked his shoulder as hard as I could.

"Don't laugh," I ordered, but he didn't listen to me.

"Let's get inside," he said flinging me on his back and dashing to the house. I realized what had happened only when he opened the back door for us to get inside.

He pushed it open and stepped inside like the proud owner he was, closing it with his right foot. I was attached to him like a spider on the wall, nearly suffocating him with my hold on his neck. I took a deep breath of my own sniffing the change of air and realizing that my left hand was hanging down against the spot where his heart was beating. I could feel him perfectly.

His breath was heavy and uneven and drops of water were rolling down his face. Rhythmic peaceful thuds were reverberating against my cold hand, heating it up. In that quietness I could hear his every sound and he could hear every pulsation of my blood.

The warmth suddenly swirling around me made me cling tighter to him, though I knew I should have let him go. My eyes adjusted to the soothing darkness all too soon and I caught a glimpse of his face. It was marvelously glowing in the moonlight. He was still wearing a happy face, but he was nervous once more. Just like when we had arrived. I was able to hear his breathing, feel his heart beating underneath my palm and they matched mine. I relished the moment and surprised myself with the longing for more and the sorrow I felt when he jolted the stillness.

"I think I have some clothes for you to change," he said below a whisper, putting his hand on mine, breaking the strong hold I had on his neck.

"You're so cold," I noticed sadly as he helped me to my feet. He evaded my eyes in the dim-lit room, then gripped my waist, chuckling.

"You're really strong for such a little deer."

"I'm not little," I hissed offended. I hated when people laughed at my short stature.

"Or course not," he kept taunting me, pulling me closer to him. My breath hitched and my heart stopped beating only to start pounding faster with fear and anticipation. It nearly hurt to be so close to him. I was afraid I couldn't stop anymore the feelings that were intensifying with each minute. He lugged me even closer, towing me slightly to the side, his hand reaching somewhere behind me. I was now running out of breath and fighting with myself to keep from touching his chest.

"I think it's safer for you a proper lit room. Just in case." A blinding light spread around us, hurting my eyes in the process and he released me with a bit of reluctance. Or so I thought.

"I can handle myself very well in the dark, thank you very much," I said, pushing him backward.

"Yeah, I've seen that," he raised an eyebrow mockingly, clearly reminding me about last night in the office.

I ignored his attempts to annoy me and dismissed him with a hand. He rolled his eyes like he wanted to say: "You know I'm right." But he wasn't. I was finding my way pretty well in the dark, but I didn't like it. That often made me jumpy. I blinked, hiding my head from his gaze. It was harder for me to get used to the light than I'd done with the dark and he immediately noticed my discomfort. In a lightning-fast movement he flicked off the lights and switched on the light spots.

"Is it better like this?" he softly demanded, concern on his face. Actually it was. The atmosphere seemed even romantic with that hazy light drifting over.

"Yes, thank you," I replied, suddenly unable to look away from his eyes. It was like a weird magnetism was revolving around us, or just around me. I sighed somehow distressed and let my head hang down.

"Come on, let's get you out of this clothes," he boomed, after studying my face for a few minutes, and scooped me up in his arms. Involuntarily, I gave off a shrill scream at his abrupt movement, but my eyes were not exactly widening because I'd become so close to him in a matter of seconds. His words were ringing noisily in my ears, wilting any other sound. Indisputably, he couldn't have meant what I was thinking now. But the way he had told them, the way his eyes had sparkled gleefully. I shuddered in his arms and reminded myself too late that I was supposed to protest at his behavior.

"Jasper, what are you doing?" I chided once he hit the stairs leading upstairs. He stopped dead on the spot and for a second I thought he would drop me, but he only held me closer.

"Jasper," he repeated under his breath as an unknown shade crossed his face. He then lowered his eyes to meet mine, taken his time to check my every feature. I had always thought that a long unperturbed silence had the tendency of turning into an awkward pause. This time I wished it would be awkward. This time, however, the silence was so intense that I felt my heart constrict painfully. Something was about to happen and I felt it in my heart that it would change a great part of my life. I wasn't ready to deal with it yet, though it was approaching swiftly and undeniably.

"Should I call you Mr. Whitlock?" I poorly teased. He then smiled the most brilliant smile I had every seen. It warmed my heart.

"No. Jasper sounds wonderful," he concluded, taking off again. Right there and then I knew what had changed and what I couldn't stop anymore. His ecstatic smile had given me the answer I needed. I was in love with him. I had fallen for him in less than two days and I couldn't do anything about it. All of a sudden my life was circling around this one person, a person that had been thinking about me for four years, a person that could never be replaced by someone else.

As he placed me down on the smooth carpet I shook away my dizziness without really succeeding in it. I needed a minute for myself and thanked God when he headed to the door. My hand reached out to him, but I controlled myself before he could see me.

"You can use this bedroom," he hummed. "You have a nice bathroom right there and I'll bring you some clothes to wear tonight." My stupor and my current revelation made me see things that were not there, not in his words at least.

"Thank you," I nodded appreciatively. I turned from his view to look less of a stupid when I heard his drumming fingers on the door.

"And hey," he added. "Please don't soak my carpets. I bought them at an auction." I burst into a sort of hysteric laughter and hurled a shoe at him.

"Shut up," I said as he caught my shoe. He doubled up before he dropped the shoe to the ground and closed the door.

I would have lain down on those carpets only to get on his nerves, but I didn't have the heart. They really looked expensive and I had to admit that I loved his taste. In a few minutes I succumbed to a hot restful bath and let myself relax under the gentle pressure of the water. When I came to the surface it had passed more than an hour. I chuckled. Everyone called me crazy for spending such a long time bathing.

I wrapped a towel around my body and paced back in the bedroom, finding a pile of clothes drafted on the huge bed that he had left for me. I touched them with a foolish gentleness like they would break if I squeezed too hard and chuckled at the stack of men clothes. Gray sweatpants, white and blue t-shirts, black and white button down shirts, a dark blue sweater, another pair of trousers...I had a wide range I could pick out from. Instinctively I pulled the black shirt out of the mass of clothes and drew it closer to me. Feeling his scent on the soft fabric I remembered why my heart was thudding crazily in my chest. I breathed in his aroma and let myself fall on top of the bed. God, it felt good. Terrifying, but good.

Pressing a kiss to the collar of the shirt I jumped to my feet looking desperately for my purse. I blew out a breath, relieved when I found it on one of the nightstands. He had really taken care of my accommodation. I smiled with an overwhelming need to confess my feelings.

"God Alice there have been only two days," I sighed to myself in the empty room. Or four years if I counted the past too.

I darted to my handbag and in a flash second I hit upon what I needed. Thank God I was always carrying lingerie with me. I retrieved my panties from the bag with its marching black bra and slipped in, performing pirouettes to check if I looked good. When I decided I was looking acceptable I enveloped myself with his black shirt and fastened the buttons, all except for the first. My eyes came across the clock exactly when a deafening clatter echoed in the house. I jumped and dashed downstairs.

The living room was empty and loosely familiar. It took me a second to realize I'd been here only an hour or so. I wanted to shove aside the nagging feeling I had, but not seeing Jasper anywhere made me unthinkably anxious. As I hurried back upstairs I prayed with all my heart for him to be alright. At the end of the hall the door was cracked open and I assumed that was his bedroom. Although I wanted to see him without delay my feet carried me slowly and warily. I pushed the door open with minimum of power and peeked inside. A welcoming twinkle swathed the room creating a luring effect for me. I had to get inside. I needed to. I walked inside looking for him, but he was nowhere to be seen.

"Jasper?" I called out. No answer came.

"Alice?" his voice came from behind, moments after. I turned relieved to find a god in its unbearable beauty cocking his head to the side, waiting for me to speak.

"I–I didn't..." I stuttered, watching him transfixed.

"I must have disquieted you," he crooned.

I was vaguely aware of his voice penetrating my ears and the fact that, after all, he had made that horrible sound. The most part of my concentration was focused on his glorious body. My eyes were thirstily traveling up and down his sculptural frame, discovering a beauty I hadn't thought possible. He wore no clothes apart from the towel wrapped tightly around his waist which was falling heavily to his knees. His ripped chest was screaming for attention and his inhumanly strong arms were weapons of protection. His skin was as pale and fragile-looking as the one of his face and I wondered how he had survived those long scars grazing his abdomen and his shoulders. The mark on his jaw was mirrored four times on his body, making my heart tighten with pain and trepidation. On both of his shoulders, a hemispherical scar was wounding its way down, being interrupted somewhere below his collarbone and starting again three centimeters above his bellybutton. The damage on his chest was more brutal and prominent. It looked as if it had just healed. I knew for sure that those light pink scratches were showing another side of him. A side I wanted to know about, but I was cowardly afraid of asking.

I tried to ignore those scores and concentrate on his shimmering beauty and so I found myself confronting his resolute gaze. His hair was wet and stinging in all directions like sun rays and his cheeks held a subtle tint of cherry. But that was not what made me gasp. His eyes, tormented as ever, showed a never seen before shade of craving. For the tinniest second I felt like I could read the same need I had for him in his eyes. For the most magical moment I indulged the vain hope that he wanted me too. But this special moment was slowly and yet so abruptly coming to an end and I knew I had only seconds to marvel over his astonishing splendor. Puzzlingly, I let my eyes trail down his body again and bit my tongue forcefully to keep from wheezing when I stumbled upon his white towel that was covering the clear outline of an unmistakable bulge. In that instant my mind crazily made up million of scenarios and in the end I realized that in one way or another, every one of them hurt me.

"I didn't know you were busy," I murmured, unable to take my eyes off that spot. He had told me I was the first to come here. I believed him entirely. And now...now I had the unbearable doubt that someone else was here, with him, touching him where I could not, loving him as I was dying to do myself. I felt like I was losing him, though I didn't even have him. This love that was rapidly expanding in my chest was not the result of two days. It was the result of a whole life of waiting for him. He was what I needed, what I wanted and what I could not have.

"I was just showering," he replied uncertain of how to interpret my words, then he followed my eyes and puffed as I would have done myself moments earlier. I didn't wait for him to continue or for me to have an emotional outburst and dashed to the door. But he was faster than me. Before I could touch the doorknob, his hand had already slammed the door shut and pushed it flatly with it. His skin grew lighter still under the pressure he used to keep the door closed as I struggled to push him away and escape from his lair. "Alice," he thundered, efficiently numbing me. "I've told you I haven't brought anyone here. What on earth were you thinking?"

Once again I was dumbfounded at his ease to read my thoughts, my mood, my all. He was breathing angrily in my ear, making it harder for me to concentrate on an accurate answer. I could nearly feel his lips touching the skin of my ear and his chest brushing my back. I took a deep calming breath and made the effort to speak.

"I don't know what I was thinking," I managed, surprising myself how upset I sounded. "But it's obvious I shouldn't be here." It was definitely not what he wanted to hear from me, but at least it was true. It was annoying to be incapable of lying to him, even for a little bit. "Please let me go," I continued.

"Go where?" he asked through his clenched teeth. "You're not going anywhere tonight." Maybe I should have been afraid, but I was achingly attracted to him. In an attempt to avoid his eyes I lifted my gaze to his hand and unintentionally pushed back into him when I noticed his bloody fingers.

"Oh, my God, Jasper, what have you done?" I chocked.

"It's nothing," he dismissed, removing his hand from the door and turning away from me. I could have left now, but I didn't want to anymore. He was hurt.

"Let me see," I pleaded.

"I told you. I don't want you staining my carpets and if you throw up you'll certainly stain them," he chuckled humorlessly. If he had the idea he had fooled me with his tone he was deadly wrong.

"Let me see," I repeated.

This time it was not a friendly request. This time it was an order. He turned and to my surprised he outstretched his hand to me. When I thought he was submitting to my inquiry and held my own hand to take his, his other hand snatched me in his arms. The sudden proximity was absolutely dazzling. I was so close to him I could have touched his lips with my own if it hadn't been for my tiny stature. Instead, I let them rest on his chest. Although he had just come out of the shower he was still cold.

"This...everything, Alice, everything is because of you. I can't hide it anymore. I can't do it. I've been keeping it to myself for over four years and at some point I thought I could go on without you, but now when I crashed into you again all my efforts seemed futile. I don't know why I've even tried."

He kept one powerful arm around my waist, not offering me escape – not that I wanted any – and the other was fervently running up and down my left arm. I needed him like I needed to see the sun. And if I could have him, nothing else mattered. His hand cupped my flaming cheek and froze there waiting for something that was making my heart pound like it had the beats counted.

"I've been waiting for this moment all my life and now it seems that all my mistakes are bound to keep me away from you. I would never be worthy of you," he muttered sorrowfully.

"Jasper" I stopped him, finally looking him in the eyes. I saw there everything I loved, everything that kept my soul warm. "I need to see your hand," I muttered for the third time reminding myself that this was more important at the moment than my urge to take by storm his lips and make them mine.

He sighed, but complied with my wish.

"I won't puke. I promise," I tried to lighten the atmosphere.

He let out a small laugh, though I wasn't completely sure of its accuracy. His phalanxes were savagely cut and fresh blood was oozing out of his wounds. There was no doubt he was in pain, but with all these he didn't even wince. I caressed his fingers with the softest of touches before I jumped to my feet and rushed into the bathroom. My action took him by surprise and he realized what I was doing only when I was already inside the cryptic space.

"Alice, stop," he cried, but I was frozen in the doorway, watching without comprehending the sight in front of me.

"What have you done?" I repeated my question, struggling to keep my mind in the present. I was so close to lose it. He had hurt himself. He had done that to himself. In that split second a sphere of anger erupted inside my chest and I needed to let it out. All of it.

"What have you done?" I shouted, spinning back to his bedroom, only to find him standing behind me. His eyes were stuck to the ground. "Oh, so you feel ashamed," I hissed. "Why have you done this to yourself? Why, Jasper, why?" He was still as a stone, which increased my otherworldly rage and my fist started cuffing his chest as tears poured down my cheeks. I couldn't care less what he was thinking about my tantrum. I just knew that I was mad at him. Mad because he had put himself in danger. Mad because he was now bleeding. And mad because I was painfully falling in love with him with each second. He let me hit him for a while without saying a word, then he gently, but firmly grabbed both of my hands.

"You'll hurt yourself," he whispered miserably. I snapped my head to him to see his big green eyes clouded with a haze of helplessness. I couldn't take it anymore. I could not see him hurt. I hurled myself away from him and returned to my room - or the room he had offered me. He didn't follow.

The thick silence of the house suddenly seemed too loud. The warmth spreading its peaceful veils felt suffocating. And the throbbing in my chest was too powerful and too violent to handle all by myself. Though, I had been angry at him, and I still was, being in his presence was calming for more than one reason. I couldn't rationally explain it, but when I was near him I felt at peace. I felt hope.

For a second I needed to remind myself why I was still upset, but maintaining this attitude toward him resulted to be more difficult than I had expected. I sunk onto the bed and tried to empty my mind of everything. I tried to focus my attention on the smooth crystal lake covered by water lilies. The memory was so strong that I could almost taste their scent on my tongue. It was the scent of spring, and sun...and love. I rolled onto my belly, burying my face in the pillows. There was no spring, just a bittersweet fall. There was no sun, just a solitary night. And there was no love...apart from what I knew I was feeling.

The clock on my nightstand was ticking noisily marking every second that I was alone in somebody else's house. The urge that was growing greater and harder to bear took the best of me. I climbed out of bed and tiptoed to the door, letting myself out without the slightest clamor. I walked to the stairs, determinedly looking everywhere, but in the direction of his room. The hall was shadowy, apart from the lamp placed close to the stairs. I thanked his good taste in decorating and descended the stairs. Yet again, the living room was empty. It seemed that no one was in the house. For a brief moment I wondered whether or not he had left me here alone, but then shoved the thought out of my mind. In my heart, I knew he would never do that to me.

I made my way to the kitchen, sensing a looming bed time and prayed he had stocked his fridge with fresh milk. A diffuse light bathed the kitchen and I danced confidently toward my target. I gave a huge grin to the blinding light of the refrigerator when I found what I wanted. I poured myself a glass, then leaned against the countertop and attentively examined his kitchen. That was the first time I realized I had been spending practically all day in his house and not even once had I paid proper attention to my surroundings. I had to admit that he was a genius. He had built a house all by himself. I couldn't imagine anyone doing a better job. I smiled appreciatively at the same time my fingers stumbled upon a rectangular piece of paper. I picked it up and raised my eyebrows when I discovered that something was written on it.

_"Forgive me for ruining everything. Sometimes a brute cannot change on his own. Sometimes a mistake is more powerful than anything good he might have done. I am sorry for upsetting you. You have no idea how much I wish I were the perfect man. But I am not. And I need salvation._

_Still, I'd like to know that you are not upset anymore. Would it be very detestable of me to ask you to watch the stars before you fall asleep and not let me ruin your dreams too? Wear a happy face as you sleep and think about every joyful moment of your life. I–"_

I lowered the note to my chest and did as he wished. I smiled and by some sweet miracle I was not mad at him anymore. Had I ever truly been? Could I still be? I read the message again and this time my eyes fell upon the last word. _I_...he'd wanted to say something more, but he stopped. I wanted to know that something, but tonight was not the night. It was best if we just chatted and tried to act normally.

I knocked at his door loudly, immediately deciding that I had to be commending as he had called me. I heard him approaching, then hesitating a tiny bit before opening the door. A flash of my past anger glimmered in my eyes when I saw him looking to the ground instead of looking in my eyes.

"Downstairs, now," I commanded. "I want to watch a movie."

That was all I told him and I desperately hoped he would follow me. I turned and headed to the stairs, hardly restraining myself from looking back. I sighed relieved when I heard his light footsteps right behind me. The smile spreading on my face was foolish enough, but I couldn't conceal it.

I hopped onto his white sofa and crouched my feet under me waiting for him to turn on the flat screen. It was pretty dark around, but I could distinguish the big living room, the never-ending wall of glass behind the sofa, the small amount of modern furniture blended perfectly together with some old pieces.

"You will need these," he appeared by my side handing me a blanket and my forgotten glass of milk. I took them from him, giving him a small grateful smile.

"Thank you," I whispered.

"My pleasure," he responded taking a sit beside me. We were close, but not close enough. He switched on his DVD-player and the movie started. I wondered if he was planning on saying something to me or just watching the movie. I was more interested in talking, in clarifying things, in sorting out my feelings. The movie was just a nice background to have.

"This movie has a name?" I asked, failing to appear irritated any longer.

"The wings of the dove," he answered without moving his eyes away from the screen. I raised an eyebrow in surprise. The title sounded very good, but I doubted I would be able to pay attention to the movie with Jasper by my side. "I think it's about the right choice you have to make once in a lifetime," he continued. "Either you choose the man you love regardless of his social background or you take your rightful place in society and give him up."

My face constricted achingly in response to his commentary about the movie. He hadn't picked this movie only because it was some sort of masterpiece. This movie reminded him about something. About us. I shifted uncomfortably and watched attentively for twenty minutes, then I knew I had had enough.

"It's cold," I started unsure of his reaction. I considered it was a pretty detached thing to say.

The cushions budged under his weight as he came closer to me. I stopped breathing when I felt his strong arm curling around my shoulder and drawing me to his chest. He rubbed his hands against my skin, leaving a fine sensation behind.

"Better now?" he murmured in my ear.

"Yes," I lied. It was not actually cold, but being so tightly buried into his chest was worth the lie. After a while he stopped, resting his injured hand on my thigh. I took it carefully between my own and caressed it gently. He breathed sharply, but didn't comment on my gesture. His hand was bandaged now so the wounds were not visible anymore. Yet, I knew they were there.

"Why did you break the mirror?" I continued silently after a short pause. He sighed profoundly and threw his head back on the sofa.

"Let's just say that I didn't have a car to channel my anger on and the poor mirror was standing in my way."

"Poor mirror," I repeated, feeling the fury fighting for escape. "So you think the only damage is a broken mirror?" I cried quietly.

"Since I'm fine, yes." I scowled at him, preparing myself to crawl to the other side of the sofa when he squeezed me more forcefully to him. "Hey hey, don't get mad at me again," he pleaded.

"Then stop playing with the remote and let me watch the movie." He chuckled, making my hair stand on end. I crossed my arms over my chest and sank deeper into his embrace. I would have traded everything to stay there forever. With him. "So that's why you compete in those races? To consume your anger?" Once again I couldn't shut up and fortunately he didn't nail my mouth shut.

"It's not just about consuming my anger," his voice came calmly and detached. "I grew fond of this thing. It helps me forget about everything. It has helped me forget about you," he confessed, shocking me. He hadn't finished well his words that I became a frozen stone. "It's okay," he assured me, shaking me gently in his arms. "I'm not going to burst again. Having you so happy here it makes me happy."

"You think I am happy?" I mouthed, lifting my head to his.

"I know you are happy, though I couldn't indicate the reason." He smiled

"Right. You can feel me," I made mock of him.

"Exactly," he smirked. I rolled my eyes and returned my attention to the screen. I knew I would be unsuccessful in concentrating on the plot from the first instant.

His scent filled my nostrils and raced rapidly to my heart. I would have recognized it out of millions of scents if necessary. His chest had warmed up underneath my body and now that searing heat passed through my clothes, reaching my skin and hurrying past that barrier to capture my entire being. It was so peaceful to lie in his arms. It felt right. I rubbed my eyes in a weak attempt to keep from falling asleep, but the quietness and the strong feeling of security he was supplying me with made it harder to resist.

"I'm sorry for what I told you Monday," his voice seemed to shatter the house. I needed a second to realize he was only whispering. "I was angry and I couldn't believe I ended up on your doorstep again. I didn't know I was coming to you until I stepped inside and then it was too late to be able to keep my emotions in check. Will you forgive me for my behavior?"

I could hear his heart thumping loudly in my ear and feel his emotions like they were mine. I could picture his face twisted with anxiety and remorse, his eyes loaded with need for my forgiveness. And yet, hadn't he understood by now that it was an impossibility to be mad at him? I'd tried and I'd failed. It was useless and painful. Today I came to understand that my only option was to give in. I gave in probably more willingly than I should have.

"I have nothing to forgive," I assured him. "I – you were actually justified in reproaching me those things. I should have paid more attention. I should have known you. I should have waited for you." As I was growing more unintelligible and more vulnerable he was becoming more tensed. I fisted my hand on his shirt and held it tightly, keeping my eyes on the screen. I couldn't see anything anymore. I had almost acknowledged my feelings. Now, I was at his mercy. One single word or one simple touch would send me broken to my knees.

"I should have made you know me," I thought I heard him saying. I stood there fighting with myself in a realm between sleep and awakening. Slowly, but surely I was losing touch with consciousness and, to some extent, I prepared myself to give in to my body's requirements. Traveling on the road of a peaceful sleep I distinctly felt his lips pressing a kiss on top of my head. I sighed contentedly, then fell into oblivion.

When I woke up the sun was shinning brightly on the blue sky. I treaded softly to the window and pushed aside the curtains letting the warm sunrays flood inside. I smiled sleepily at the downy lake covered in its beautiful water lilies, then I lowered my gaze to realize I was still wearing his shirt. Immediately the remembrance of last night hit me in my chest. Powerfully and mercilessly.

He must have carried me to bed since I couldn't remember myself coming back in the room on my own feet. The thought trembled through me like a cold blaze of emotion. I walked into the bathroom and rapidly took a shower, then picked up my own clothes that thankfully had dried up over the night and slipped in absentmindedly. While I was doing my make up, I thought about what I was going to do. I was going to go back in that bedroom and collect my things, then I was going to go downstairs and face whatever was coming. I needed to be strong and to have faith. It was easier said than done. When I reached the stairs I clutched tightly my bag and sighed with resignation.

He was waiting in the living room, sitting on the sofa with his arms resting on his knees and his head bent down. He looked as if he was a tortured angel. He looked pure, yet demonic. He looked peaceful, yet a tangible fury was boiling from his core to his extremities. I shifted my weight and his head snapped to me. For a split second I caught a glimpse of his maddened eyes, then he skillfully concealed his rage and sat up to greet me. Or so I wished.

"You are awake," he murmured.

"Yes," I answered apprehensively.

"Then we should go back to the office. We have a lot of work to finish." He rushed for the door, but I was too baffled to even have the faintest reaction. Last night I had almost told him that I loved him and now he was acting like nothing had ever happened. Tears were threatening to welled up in my eyes. In that cruel second I promised to myself that I would never let him see me crying.

I followed silently and slid into the passenger sit, avoiding his eyes. To my increasing anguish he did the same. The ride back to civilization was tensed and quite…and painful. He pulled in at midday in the subterranean parking lot of my father's law firm. Once outside his brilliant car I threw a thank you over my shoulder and hurried to my office. I didn't stop running until I was locked up in my bathroom.

The hours passed and eventually I could think about all that happened more clearly with a slight tint of detachment. When I heard the phone beeping in my office I jumped and unwillingly stumbled my way to answer it.

"Yes, Gianna?"

"Mr. Whitlock is here to see you." I was on the point of ordering her to tell him that I had left or that I didn't want to see him. But that was childish.

"Let him in," I whispered mutely.

I picked my cell phone from the table and skimmed through my text messages, quickly reading three memos from Rose. She had gone from insupportably angry to childishly sad because of her lost puppy and the divorce and finally asked me to have a girl night as soon as possible. I felt him enter, but I didn't lift my head up to greet him. I still didn't know what to say. Instead, I looked for an appropriate message to send to my friend and hit the send button when I found it.

_Tonight I'm available for all plans and purposes. Call you later._

When I knew it was time to look at him I sighed quietly and straightened to confront him. I raised an eyebrow as I came across his face, a face I had yet to see from him. He approached me nonchalantly and stopped a foot away from me. He licked his dried lips and run a hand through his honey-sweet hair in a short magnificent second.

"They really want to divorce, but they asked for three days to think it through," he scoffed as he threw on my desk the folder he had whirled between his index and middle finger. My eyes were stubbornly glued to the porcelain flesh exposed right below his neck where he had left two buttons unfastened. He caught me looking at him – not that I had bothered to hide it – and his sharp intake of breath rebounded around the room. With a blurry motion he slammed me into his chest and lifted me off the ground. My hands grabbed his shoulders for support as I stared down at him bewildered. I couldn't comprehend what he was doing – or perhaps I was too shaken to make myself understand – and the deepened frown on his face when he met my eyes confused me even more.

I blew out a breath and so my last gulp of air had run off me. In a second I grasped more than one thing: his fingers tangled firmly in my hair, his iron arms wrapped around my waist, his body much too pressed against mine to ignore and his lips capturing mine. After the shock wore off, I started to act in response to his moves. I clenched a fist into his hair and held his head as closely as possible to mine. As the tip of his tongue lightly traced my lips I abandoned myself to my suffocating need for him. I was completely lost in him.

My lips parted offering him entrance and he assaulted me in the most sensual way I had ever experienced. Our kiss was an overwhelming blend of purity, sweetness, passion and lust. And all of them had something in common. Our ardent love. In that precise instant I knew for sure that he wanted and loved me too.

He sat me on the table and continued dominating my lips and I eagerly let him. His fingers touched the skin above my collarbone, winding up toward my cheek and coming to a halt behind my neck, pushing me closer to him. The hand he'd had wrapped tightly around me fell from my waist to my thigh, driving it aside so he could press his body against mine once more. My legs hugged him involuntarily, moving in synchronization with my lips. It was like my entire life was hanging on that simple kiss. He nipped and sucked on my lips for what seemed an eternity and I reacted just as fervently.

When he slowed down and let his hand gently fall from my hair all the way down to my wrist I moaned in protest. He gave me one last chaste kiss, then lowered his head to the side and dug his fingers on either side of me in the hard wood of the desk, breathing heavily. I could literally feel the warmth of his cheek brushing over my breasts. I shuddered with pleasure, caressing his beautiful golden locks and waiting for him.

"You look at me as if I'm something to eat and then you expected me to just be deferential? How could I, Alice?"

I breathed, inhaling his aroma and holding onto his shoulders to keep my clearness of mind. I still couldn't believe that we'd kissed. The texture of his soft lips was still impregnated on mine. As long as I had been snaked around him I felt him mine. Now, it was like a gap was creeping up between us. Suddenly, I felt cold.

"Last night we were so close and still so far apart," he started again, creating a screen of anxiety around my body. "I can't handle that, Alice. Not anymore. Whether I'm leaving for good or I'm staying to gain you."

I pressed my fingers to my temple, trying to see my future. This was one of the few times I would have killed to have a supernatural ability. But I didn't and I couldn't be sure of anything. Only a word from me had the power of changing everything, but was I certain that I wouldn't get hurt? I sighed undecided as he put a chilly distance between us and ran his hands over his face in an exasperated manner. "I think I got my answer," he murmured without waiting anymore and stormed out of my office.

I stared in the distance not really registering anything. It felt like I had just lost something more important than life itself. A lump raised in my throat as stinging tears filled my eyes. _I want you to stay_, the thought swirled in my mind. Five hours later I found myself curled up into a ball, sinking deeply into my black leather couch and racking my brains in search of where he could possibly be. I needed to see him. In that precise second. Then, why hadn't I been able to tell him that before he left? A shiver ran down my spine as Rose burst inside jumping on me to kiss me. I smiled weakly and slightly loosened my stance.

"I don't know what to do, Alice. Em is driving me crazy. Sometimes I want so badly to kick him out of the house, but most of the time I desperately need him. But he lost my puppy and I need my puppy. You know I love him?"

The velocity she had spoken with was staggering, though I was used to it. Normally it was no problem to have her speaking like she was chased by barbarians, but tonight... I smiled inwardly for having the capacity of mostly keeping up with her.

"The puppy or Em?" I asked, teasing her.

"Em, of course Em. Tough, you might be unable to differentiate since he's acting like a puppy from the time when I told him I want the divorce. Again."

I sat up and sighed heavily, advancing toward my desk. I flipped my phone open and closed my eyes for a long second when I found nothing from Jasper. There were, of course, million of phone calls missed and hundreds of texts unanswered, but nothing at all from him. I threw the device in my purse and made sure the keys of my Porsche were there too.

"I think I'm not the only one in need of a girl night," Rose muttered from inches behind. I sheepishly turned to face her.

"You might be right," I replied, not bothering to lie to her. It was useless and besides I already knew what I wanted to do.

"So let's go hunt the guy," she joked like she had read my thoughts, moving to the door.

There had been a time when Rose and I used to go clubbing every night and her favorite activity was to hunt guys - as she obnoxiously referred to the delicate process of seducing men. That ended abruptly when she met Emmett. I let out a laugh remembering those times and she laughed with me, obviously thinking about the same thing.

After we both leapt into my yellow Porsche, I took off at full speed and accelerated toward the only place I knew I could find him. He must be angry, or upset at the very least and I doubted he cared if he got caught by the police again. Rose's eyes widened when the speedometer needle hit 180 miles per hour and I rolled my eyes anxiously.

"You know I don't care about the speed," she explained. "I care about you. And it seems your heart is beating as fast as your car is flying toward an unknown destination. If not faster."

"We're going outside of Seattle. The place where car races are held." In that short second her eyes darkened and her body tensed up to the point of explosion. I could nearly touch her fury. I was sorry for not telling her earlier, but now it was too late.

"Stop the car, Alice," she ordered, grabbing my right arm.

"No!" I cried. "I need to see him Rose. I need to explain to him how utterly stupid he is. He didn't understand anything. He doesn't know anything..." I trailed off, unconsciously slowing down.

"Stop," he softly urged, still having a firm tone in her voice. I don't know why, but this time I obeyed and pulled over. "Tell me," she pleaded. "Who is he?" I sighed resigned and opened up to her. In a matter of minutes I told her everything that happened in the last three days.

"So you love him." It was not a question, but I nodded nonetheless.

"And I need to see him," I added.

"Then let's go find him," she beamed, patting my knee. The car was in motion before she ended her sentence.

I knew we'd arrived the moment I heard the noise. I snaked through the crowd and finally parked the car in a dark suspicious place. I prayed to God to keep my Porsche safe until I could go back to it. I hurried to Rose's side, who was keeping a straight posture, sort of arrogant and looked frantically in all directions. He was nowhere to be seen. As we got nearer still, I stopped up my ears. There were several sharp sounds penetrating the air: the sound of an insanely loud music buzzing around, the wild screeching on the pavement of numerous cars and the hysterical voices of dozens and dozens of possessed men. I shuddered to think that he was here somewhere. I knew he was. I could sense him already.

I was hurling myself into the crowd, dragging Rose after me when a husky enthusiastic voice boomed from the bullhorns. The blood froze in my veins, leaving me breathless. For a frightening second my head whirled with desperation and sheer madness. What on earth was he doing? Didn't he have the slightest idea about what he was doing to me?

"Ladies and gentlemen," the voice echoed. "In a few moments the first race of the night will bring you The Cobra versus The Demon or more seriously speaking Mr. Jasper versus Mr. Demetri. Keep your distance, your calm and most important of all keep your eyes wide open."

By the time the man had finished reciting his rhyme I was already in the first row. And I could see him now. Smiling and getting into his car. Rage at the thought of watching him putting himself in danger again flashed in my eyes, but intensely love was what overwhelmed me. Besides the painful anger I could most clearly distinguish on his face, I could also see easiness. No matter how much I liked that, I couldn't accept what he was about to do. When the door of his car banged shut my heart constricted achingly as the words flew out from my mouth instinctively.

"Jasper, don't," I shouted. He didn't hear me.

The cars rumbled loudly and in a heartbeat they were off, speeding like the life of the universe was hanging on the outcome. There were many powerful emotions coloring the atmosphere: hatred, rivalry, arrogance, rage, pain, sorrow, selfishness, shallowness, lust, corruption and love. All rolled into one heartbreaking moment. The moment I was forced to see Jasper dashing far away from me at an inhumanly fast speed. My feet started trembling and I was pretty sure I would not be able to hold my weight for much longer.

"It's fine," Rose spoke in my ear. With all that noise I was stunned that I had heard her. She wounded her hands around my waist keeping me close to her. She was several inches taller than me and she was always wearing high heels so most of the time I felt like a dwarf near a giant. This time, however, her towering frame gave me a sense of protection that kept me there. She strengthened me. She made me believe that Jasper would come back to me unharmed. "It seems that he's done this before. He knows how to deal with this. Calm down, Alice," she droned on.

I was counting my heartbeats as I waited for him. Not long since they've departed they disappeared from our range of view, making me grow more and more anxious. How was he doing? Was he safe? That husky voice shot again through the loudspeakers and I took a step back, slamming in Rose's stone-like body. She gently hushed me, but I was too far gone with my anxiety to care if I was breaking down or not. The man laughed, triggering other's man amusement. I tried to clear my mind to grasp his words, though I would have given anything to block them out.

"Looks like The Demon has a pretty good advantage here while The Cobra is furiously catching up...The Cobra has overtaken The Demon, who , I think, doesn't like it very much...Hey, he should be disqualified. The Demon has stricken Cobra's car, pushing him off the road. His car is pretty damaged. The Demon is in truth disqualified, but The Cobra is still racing. He should stop, but he keeps going though his car is pretty broken..."

I was on the point of collapsing when Rose tightened her grip on me even more. What was he doing? Why wasn't he stopping? He was killing himself. It staggered me to feel my heart still pumping forcefully life inside my chest. I was beyond insanity when he reappeared in my view. I let out a half-sigh of relief, but got bombarded by new waves of desperation as I registered heavy smoke coming out from his car. He needed to stop. Now.

"Jasper, stop," I yelled. I didn't hear myself. How could he have heard me then?

I was completely shaking with fright, incapable of moving my eyes off the scene developing in front of me. I couldn't even breathe. I could only watch. And he was drawing nearer fast. For once I was glad he was driving so fast. He was more rapidly approaching the finish line, but in the same time he might have been approaching death itself.

His car abruptly stopped and in a flash second he was pulled out of it as the hoarse voice ordered the crowd away. If it hadn't been for Rose I would have most certainly remained there. I looked in horror as he was moving away from danger infernally slow. There was no time. He had no time to escape the incontestable threat. He was going to be hurt.

"No," I screamed again and again, as part of the car exploded and a piece of it hit him. "No," I moaned in Rose's arms as she turned me to her, to hinder me from watching that terrifying image. When I wrestled myself out of her grip he was gone.

"Rose, where is he?" I demanded like a spoiled child. "He's hurt and he's...where is he?" I screamed like a mad person.

"Calm down, Alice. You're having hysterics. Someone is taking care of him. I saw him being pulled inside there," she pointed to a small tent placed at a crossroad. That was all I needed to know. I shoved her aside and darted in the direction she had just showed me.

Too many and too irritating were the people standing in my way. Though I was doing my best to push them out of my way, they persisted in jumping in front of me and hampering me from reaching my destination. I couldn't breathe properly. It seemed like the air had run out from my lungs. I needed to know that he was alright to be able to function correctly. I counted the steps as I got closer and tossed to the side the heavy curtain that was standing between me and him. How dared it to keep me away from him?

A quite rustle spun around, but to me it had been ear-splittingly loud. He turned to face me with a single impossibly fast move. His eyes widened in disbelief as he got the entire image of the mess I was in. Because of him. I'd only noted that he was alone in the tent when I finished my minute scrutiny. Apart from a large bandage on his left forearm he seemed to be in a healthy condition. He seemed okay, so why my heart was pounding like it wanted to get out of my chest and break right at his feet?

"What the hell are you doing here, Jasper? You can get hurt," I scurried at him, suddenly flying into a rage. Despite my mask of fury, I wanted to touch him, to really make sure he was unharmed.

"I don't think it affects you much what I do or stop doing." his cold voice resounded in my ears as I rooted myself in front of him. The iciness he was emanating was horrifying. It hurt me and it angered me and it prompted me to do something to defend myself. My hand slapped across his face before I could realize what I was really doing. The force of my stroke and the surprise that captured him moved his head to the side, while he took a step back for keeping his balance. I could feel tears rushing their way to the surface and I hated it.

"You don't know what you're talking about," I barely whispered.

"I think I know pretty well," he retorted cruelly. "If you had cared you would have made me stay." I frowned up at him, pinning him to the spot with my eyes. How could he say such a thing? Was he insinuating that I didn't care about him?

"You haven't even let me speak, for God's sake," I hissed. Keeping an irritated attitude helped me push back down the tears. However, I knew I wouldn't last long. I wanted so bad to pull him in a tight embrace and never let go of him. "You told me you feel what I'm feeling. You shouldn't have left in the first place. You should have already known how I feel."

The strangest glimmer crossed his features as his eyes darkened and softened in a tormenting second. I was holding my clenched fists by my sides, struggling not to listen to my erratic heart. I could almost feel it in my throat and what was worse I could feel his. Beating in tandem with mine. I let out a cry of surprise as his arms grabbed me by the waist out of the blue and pulled me to him. I was intoxicatingly close to him.

"I feel you Alice. And that's what's tormenting me to the point of losing my mind. Because I can't know for sure if it's true or if it's my heart that indulges itself in thinking that you love me too," he breathed sporadically against my neck.

"Your heart is smarter than you," I managed to whisper. I was already lost in him. I didn't care about anything else. I just needed him. Then, I remembered what he had put me through and I felt like slapping him again. Instead, I pressed my lips on his frosty skin without kissing him. "You have no idea what you're doing to me. You're like some sort of addiction that I got overnight. I can't get you out of my mind and I definitely can't get you out of my heart." I was stunned by how honest I'd been and how confident I still felt. I was not afraid anymore that I might get hurt.

"I would do anything for you. Anything..." he murmured, kissing my throat. I shuddered with pleasure at his touches and responded automatically. I pushed myself more firmly into him, knowing as I did so that I wanted more.

"Then stop these races. Stop competing in them. Come with me," I pleaded. I hadn't even realized how much I wanted him to come with me until I asked him to.

He gently pushed me back so he could see my eyes. The concentration in his green pools of life sent me directly into dizziness' arms. He looked as if he was looking for something in the depths of my existence. I was willing to give him everything as long as he accepted to be safe. I needed to know he would always be safe.

"Jasper it's your time. You're coming or what?" the man with the husky voice startled us. I didn't break eye contact with him and he didn't do it either.

"No. I'm actually leaving." he smiled pressing a kiss on my forehead and taking my hand in his "You thought I would choose this stupidity over you?" he whispered in my ear as he put us in decent positions and led me out through the back of the tent under the man's stunned eyes.

I was floating beyond delight. He had submitted to my wish so willingly that I could not comprehend why I had doubted him. Several other voices yelled at him as he walked by my side completely ignoring them. I felt not only deeply satisfied, but also excruciatingly attracted by him. After the anguish had been replaced from my heart, a ball of fire took its place, spinning in my chest and asking for a single thing. For him. I could see his car parked in the distance when I remembered I had left Rose behind.

"Oh, no," I cried. He bent his head to mine looking utterly taken aback and scared.

"What is it, Alice?" he forced himself to speak. I rolled my eyes at his uncertainty and childish fear and dragged him to me to kiss him.

"I left Rose behind. Let me go and hand her my keys and I'll be right back." He let go of me with obvious reluctance and I walked away as grudgingly as he watched me drew farther away. I increased my speed and in less than ten minutes I was back to the tent where Rose was waiting.

"So nice of you to let me here alone," she complained, a smile tugging at the corner of her lips.

"I know," I fidget, absolutely incapable of hiding my own smile.

"Can you tell me what happened or you are too busy?"

"I think I am busy, yeah," I chuckled at her innuendo and dropped my eyes to my purse, looking for the keys of my car. "Would you mind driving home alone?" I asked timidly.

"As long as you know what you're doing with this Jasper I think I'll be fine."

"Thank you," I muttered, kissing her cheek and preparing myself to dart back to him. My plan, though, got interrupted by a rough voice. When I turned to face the man, I gasped in surprise realizing there were three filths and not just one. This was the first time I thought that I had made a mistake by coming here. Still, I was not sorry for it. I was actually glad.

"Ladies, the party is over. Do you need a ride? We have bikes," one of them offered.

"No, thank you," Rose and me answered in unison.

"Don't be like that," another chided. "We are good guys. Please come," he purred, attempting a step forward. We automatically recoiled.

"Leave them alone," a so familiar voice thundered a few steps behind them. They turned, creating an opening that allowed me to see him clearly. He was fuming uncontrollably. Like a predator protecting its prey. Like an angel guarding its dove. My heart swelled with pride and love. I was safe now.

"It's cool man. We were just talking," they hurried to back off.

"Talk with people of your own stamp," he threateningly warned. They disappeared without any further ado. "Are you okay?" he murmured in my ear. I hadn't even had time to register his movements as he hurried by my side. I nodded reassuringly and slipped my hand in his. Though I was doing it only for the second time, it felt natural. Like it was supposed to be. I glanced at Rose who was scrutinizing us with a smile on her face and blushed furiously.

"Hello, Mrs. Hale," he acknowledged her presence, still keeping his eyes on my face.

"Call me, Rose," she indicated, playing with the keys in her hand. "I think I should go now," she added. Jasper pulled me closer to him and we followed Rose to the car silently. After she got inside we nodded our goodbyes, then worked the nerves to look each other in the eyes. I could die right there in his arms and I wouldn't have cared.

"Let's go," he whispered. It was late and it was cold. But that was definitely not what made me follow him so eagerly. Somewhere along the way he disentangled himself from me and let me lead the way. He was only a step behind, which made my heart race infuriatingly fast. I couldn't concentrate on anything apart from him. I glued my eyes to his car as it came into view and advanced quietly, struggling to control my heartbeats and breath intakes. It was useless. Though I was past the point of anxiety, somehow I managed to feel calm. His presence did that to me. It was like he was controlling every emotion crossing my heart.

When we finally got to his car he didn't open it as he should have. That struck me as odd and I turned to him. If he wanted to make a joke I felt sorry for him, but he wasn't going to laugh at me. I knew perfectly well that he was behind me, though his footsteps were unimaginably light.

"Jasper," I started, but closed my mouth immediately. The sheer agonizing lust I met on his face break down all my defenses. I didn't need safety anymore or the certainty that I would not be hurt. I only and exclusively needed him. He approached me, like a beast stalks its prey and clasped my head in his strong hands pushing it back and molding his mouth with mine. It was asphyxiating. He let an arm fall down to my waist and gripped it roughly driving me backwards until my back hit the frame of his car. I could feel myself burning wildly, although I was sandwiched between two cold solid matters.

I clenched a fist into his soft hair forcibly and yanked him closer to me, gliding my tongue into his mouth. He moaned around my lips and triumphantly continued what I had started. I smiled against his soft touches and drown into his love.

With a brusque precise movement his hand grabbed my knee and pulled it up to his waist. I was pressing painfully against his front, suddenly gasping for breath and clenching his forearms to steady myself. I looked coyly at him to discover his eyes glazed with unleashed yearning.

"Alice, I can't stop now," he moaned. That was all I needed. His words triggered my own craving for him and in a second my hands were locked behind his neck and my mouth was again an inch away from his.

"Who said you should stop?" He didn't say anything, but pressed his lips on mine and kissed me without restraint our lips danced as our bodies lined up for the most ancient ritual of passion.

"I don't think we'll make it to the house," he muttered between kisses. A slight frown creased my brows as I fisted my hands in his hair stopping him for a moment.

"To the house? You were planning this?" I demanded, torn between amusement and sudden fear of being only a one-night stand.

"I'm a man, Alice. I have fantasies. And irritatingly enough you are in every one of them." I cocked an eyebrow at him as my lips pulled up into a half smile.

"Well, I'm a woman who wants you infuriatingly much. I need you," I breathed against his swollen lips. "Right now."

"Patience, love," he murmured, brushing his lips against mine, but slowly pushing me back. I groaned in protest and he chuckled. "I've been waiting for this moment for four years. I think I can wait an hour more to make it perfect."

After that he moved so fast that I didn't even realize where the time had flown by that he was already parking in front of his house. In the few seconds it took him to get out of the car and encircle it to come and open my door I recognized the tension that had floated between us. Now it was reaching its highest peak and I felt like I couldn't breathe. At all. He scooped me up in his arms sinking his eyes into mine. If I dared to let my mind wander toward the direction we were headed I would surely lost my grip on reality. It was as beautiful as it was terrifying and I wanted it all.

"Do you have any idea how much I love you, Alice?" he softly asked as he laid me on his bed. I shook my head to break out from my reverie and gave him a broad smile.

"I think I do." For the night, I knew those words were the last I had been capable of forcing out. I wrenched him up to me and captured him with my arms. I could feel the entire length of his body pressing against mine. I could hear his every breath and every heartbeat. I could feel him mine.

He traced kisses up and down my throat, licking as he went. I couldn't handle it much longer. I threw my head back in the pillows and let my arms fall heavily with need by my sides.

"Jasper," I moaned trancelike.

He nuzzled his nose against my ear, biting gently on my left earlobe as his hand slid up underneath my chemise, raising goose bumps. He adoringly caressed the skin of my stomach, circling my bellybutton with his index finger, then continued his journey upward. I gasped embarrassingly loud when his fingers reached the base of my breasts, sprawling my legs under his weight to offer him a better position. He slid between my blazing feet naturally.

"All this time of waiting," he mumbled between kisses. "I've never imagined it would be so exquisite."

He shifted, lifting his weight off me, making me panicky instantaneously. I looked at him stunned, then understood what he wanted. He threw one arm over his head and grabbed the collar of his shirt yanking it away with a single decisive move. This time I was not interested in marveling over his mesmerizing beauty. This time I wanted to feel his flesh blending with mine. He bent back down and kissed me as he unfastened the buttons of my chemise. My breath hitched and he smiled pleased with his progress.

"You're so painfully beautiful Alice. You have to know it." I closed me eyes as he snaked an arm around my waist and pulled me up to him so he could remove the unnecessary clothing. When I opened them he was staring at me with the most delightful smile adorning his face. "You're beautiful," he repeated.

"And I'm yours," I completed.

He put me back down on the bed, drinking me in, from the swells of my breast to the line where my pants tightly hugged my hips, then crouched over me, pressing a wet kiss between my breasts. A shiver ran down my body and I moaned with pleasure. He trailed his hot tongue down south until he met the waistband of my pants, then he clasped between his teeth the fly. He raised his eyes to meet mine and chuckled softly. The vibrations of his laughter did strange and unorthodox things to my body. I was on the verge of coming undone right there and then without even giving him the chance to make me. He unzipped it with his mouth, then unlocked the button and in a second my pants were flying down to the ground. I let my legs fall slowly around his body stroking his shoulders, his arms, his waist, his thighs. Unexpectedly, he clutched me by the ankles and smashed me into him.

"You're driving me crazy," he muttered his mouth already on mine.

Absentmindedly I realized that unlike me he had an awful amount of clothes on him. Clothes that needed to be removed. I seized his shoulders and crawled to my knees, then pushed him back until he was lying outstretched on his back. I straddled him mercilessly and bowed down to kiss his sensual lips, his mouthwatering throat, his marble chest, everything I could reach. My hands found the button of his jeans on their own and firmly unzipped it. Like we were working in synchronization he simultaneously unhooked my bra and tossed it over my shoulder. He didn't wait for me to rescue him from his pants, though. He kicked them off and hurled me back into the pillows. One moment I was twisted around his body and in the next he was back on top of me. God, but it felt good.

I tried to breathe fresh air and found it impossible. I could only inhale his fragrance and nothing else. His weight was pressing now resolutely against my chest, making it harder to even remember that I should breathe. I totally stopped breathing when his hands cupped my sides and started traveling down, down, down. He hooked one finger on each side around the laces of my panties and with a ferocious, yet gentle move he torn them to shreds. I could feel how exposed I was and to my utter surprise I didn't feel like I wanted to hide. I wanted more. I kept my eyes closed while he continued touching me with deliberate tender strokes.

"You are an angel, Alice," his lips were suddenly at my ear. My eyes snapped wide open, just in time to see his two points of green light turning from agony to ecstasy. As he thrust himself into me I felt filled with passion, security and love. I felt whole.

"Jasper," I kept moaning his name as he slowly moved through me. His blistering coldness was all over me and my glowing flesh was everywhere around him. I locked my legs around his waist and held on to him. To my life.

He kissed me in all the ways and places I had never imagined someone could do it. I was wrapped around his body like a towel and greeted each one of his touches with the same unbearable delight. He was slowly leading me to a magnificent land between torture and rapture, between life and death and between my past and my future. I kissed him fiercely as I sensed a powerful heat erupting from the core of my being. I was coming...fast and furious. As both of us reached the delightful ecstasy we had been seeking, I moaned loud enough to wake the dead, rolling my eyes back in my skull, and quivered mightily underneath him.

When he fell on his back dragging me after him, so I could lie on his chest, his breath was ragged and his heart was pounding frenziedly. We spent a while in silence, waiting for each other to gain control over our bodies and our minds. Had it been possible I would have stayed there all my life and wouldn't have stopped feeling so wonderful.

"Tell me how you feel," he suddenly broke the silence. I slowly lifted my gaze to him. He couldn't hide the smile ghosting across his face and I couldn't either.

"Like I've never thought I would feel. I feel loved and free and delusional enough to think that I could conquer the world with you." He chuckled along with me, pressing a kiss to my forehead and stroking my cheek.

"You may not even imagine how absolutely happy you've made me." I smiled happily running my fingers up and down his broad chest. Seeing him with a towel around his waist was one thing, but feeling him around me and inside me was downright exquisitely. I frowned involuntarily when my fingers touched the brutal marks on his abdomen and shrieked immediately, afraid that I had hurt him. Though I wasn't watching his face, I could feel him shaking his head.

"This scars," I trailed off, barely hovering me hand over his scars.

"Oh, Alice," he blew out. "There's so much you need to know about me. I'm afraid I'll scare you away." His voice sounded anguished and it hit me directly to my heart.

"You won't," I promised. "Nothing that you can tell me could scare me away as long as it's the truth." He sighed and brushed his lips against my hair. I moaned at the mere contact.

"Why haven't you stopped?" I voiced after a pause. I gaped at my own words, but to some extent I didn't regret them. It was a thing I wanted to know.

"Beg your pardon?" he whispered confused.

"Why haven't you stopped when you realized your car was so damaged? You could have gotten hurt." I could sense the anguish rushing back to me, but he smoothed it away with a single reassuring touch. He sighed and hugged me more securely.

"I think tonight I've passed the boundaries of anger. I wasn't thinking straight. That was obviously until you came in that tent like a hurricane and snapped me out of it." I pondered his words and knew from the first instant that he intentionally left something out. Whether because he didn't want to upset me or because he was ashamed of it, the fact was that he hadn't told me everything.

"Jasper," I sighed. "I need you to tell me everything. Don't hide it from me." This was true. I wanted to know everything about him, no matter how bad.

"Well the everything in my life right now and for all time is that I love you and that I want you to be mine forever."

I would never be able to express the emotion in which he whispered to me those words, but I knew that despite everything he was being honest. And I wanted to be his as I wanted him to be mine forever. "I love you Alice," he murmured, nestling his nose against my jaw, then lightly kissing my temple.

"Three days have past and I think I love you too," I answered with my heart. Maybe none of us had a proper idea of how much we loved each other. Maybe this was the beginning of our endless love.

"Four years have past and I don't think I could live without you ever again." He cupped my cheeks and bowed down to kiss me with a passion that melted my bones. I responded as fiercely, feeling a smile playing on his face. His hand massaged down my spine as my fingers tangled in his golden hair and we drowned again into that consuming feeling.

35


End file.
